Finding a Job

I  think this is the most difficult moments in my life right now is to find a job. I feel that I am in the middle of a road trying to find my way to my destination.  Feeling like I’m a lost puppy trying to find attention.

I have been focusing on being positive and be open minded about the opportunities that
may come in my way. I figured it is better to volunteer and to be a part of something than nothing. I believe that I will get a job and I will get on with my life. It’s not easy.  I am counting on my faith and just not give up.

I have many appointments lining up next week from volunteering to job search agencies that can help me out.

My goal is to get something by the end of the year. The end of the year I must complete one goal. That goal is to find myself a job.  God, I’m just thinking through this and asking you to just guide me and help me find the right path.




Why do people ignore? How to get over it?

I find it is hurtful to be ignored.

At the same time, I think it’s harder to find a way to deal with it by moving on.

Learning how to get over it.

Understand that people ignore others for reasons we may not understand.

We don’t have to. It shows a character of who they are.

I believe that there’s a line of respect and responding.

But I am done with cliff-hanging answers and sudden silences.

Maybe I’m just hurting for a bit right now. Some people are just cruel I guess.

At the same time, I cannot bury my head under the sand trying to figure out the whys.

You meet people and they teach you lessons of your actions or mistakes or whatever.

You just move on. You have to or you’ll just drive yourself crazy.

I think all of this is teaching me to be stronger every minute.

I think this is telling me to not give in too much because you expect so much and you let yourself fall hard.

It is what i is. When people ignore you. It’s a toxic sign to just let them be.

I’m trying Lord to just be positive and find people who just want to be friends with me as I continue to be myself. It’s a hard life out there. It’s hard to click with anyone when

Everyday I been misunderstood and most times they don’t even try to understand.or when I’m trying to be social but I’m an introvert.

I will get over it soon. I should. I can’t let this devil win me over. I can beat this. I cannot go back down that road.

When people ignore me, I just have to learn not to take it seriously and personally and move the fuck on. That’s just the way it is.

Gotta focus on what makes me happy and keeps me focus.

Not on what I look in others and have high expectations about them and believing in that fantasy in living in a world where you think everybody agrees with you and everybody is going to treat you kind.



Last Session of Counselling

Had my last session of counselling today. I felt good about it. I was reflecting about the last time I had my first last session of counselling was in the early Spring of last year. What makes this (last) one of today would be different? I knew that dealing with a mental illness isn’t a game. I was honest to myself and I needed help once more.

On this last day, I felt a lot better and prepared this time. I felt at peace you know? I was ready to go. My cousnellor said that I have changed so much and the way I handled situations were so much better than when I started. It felt so good to hear someone said that to me. Counselling wasn’t even about depression for me this time. It wasn’t. It was another new level. I have gotten used to challenging myself fighting against it to a point where I can’t remember the last time I was serverly depressed. I learned how to deal with my situation. The only way to deal with it was to just be. Let the emotions ride and evaporate. It was about getting my voice heard and figuring out where do I go from whatever I was going through at the time.

Sometimes you just be doing your thing and you don’t have anyone telling you that you’re doing a great job and they can see it. I learned so many techniques to self-love, self-help myself and learn to see things the way they are without assumptions and overthinking.

I still sit and ask myself how did I go through this and be able to focus in school, fitness and self care? It was my mindset and it’s about choosing battles. If I’m stressing, I ask myself, why am I here? I came here to finish what I started. Whatever that was, I just hang on and just complete it. When I’m in that zone, I don’t worry about the negatives, the pleasing others, yearning for anything.

At the end of the day, that if I continue to be honest to myself that is good for me and around others without fear and continue to respect others, I’m going to continue on a road that will allow myself to be free and happy.

My experiences with my mental health is different from another person. My reality is not their reality. It is okay to get help and not let shame get in your way. It’s so important not to be too biased about situations that you’re not familiar with or never experienced with. It’s important to understand just because you and I may be going through the situation doesn’t mean our experiences are the same. It’s important to understand how remarkable diversity is. So many different realities of someone else’s life.

When I’m stressed or I’m going through some stuff. I self-reflect even when I’m on the majority side of the situation. I draw, I write, I do whatever it is to let it out. Reminding myself where I am and be mindful about what’s happening around me. Going back to my core self keeps me focused. So even if I may be falling, I am still going to rise and continue to journey of my success and happiness. Stressing about situations that you simply cannot change isn’t going to help you. It’s our reactions and our responses to them will either allow myself to close the doors and walk away respectfully. I mind my business and focus on what is best for me. Counselling to me is a journey toward wellness and writing my opening chapter of my new book. Thanks for reading. – Z

Back when movies were so good!


Who remembers Elijah Wood? Man, this movie is so good.  I watch this and I feel like it’s 1999 all over again. Back when we had movies like this, lots of young adults acting from when they were kids. Back when 3D wasn’t popular. I feel that actors and actresses in this generation are not really acting, some of them are just overacting to a point where you cannot connect to the character and you realize that they’re just acting their lines. Humour isn’t the same either. Just like how sitcoms are trying to come back to where it used to be, but reality tv are taking over. There’s only a few good ones out right now. I think that this generation when it comes to entertainment business, it is not the same.   This explains why some shows are hard to watch and end up watching old shows or old movies that I can watch and enjoy.

Anyways, I’m not sure if I’m making any sense. I’m probably wasting my time. But enjoy this movie though. It’s a good one!

What movies do you keep watching from back in the day?


Selfies and Dubsmash

Why do people love taking selfies? Why do people love using Dubsmash videos?


I love Dubsmash! 

I love taking selfies because it is a hobby and I know can be a little too much because if you go on my Instagram page. I post a lot of selfies. I don’t really pay attention to those who tell me that I post a lot of pics of myself.  I can’t live for them. I am me and I can post whatever I want.

I think that asking people to take photos of you or my peers can lead into a situation where they don’t take the photo right and the picture doesn’t turn out as well as you like it to be.  Another example can be when you want to take a picture but not everybody wants to take a picture with you. That can be a problem. When I’m taking a selfie, it means I’m in charge of my own photography.  Put the camera somewhere, set the timer and I’m good to go. To me, it’s a fun thing to do. I love doing it. I do understand that it can be too much and people can become narcissistic.   Sometimes taking selfies can become a bad habit and it is hard to put the phdownload-dubsmashone down. Phones have become such an addictive device. It is hard to go anywhere without having a phone on you.

Dubsmash is an app that allows people to record themselves using the songs or clips that have been uploaded by users. They have about less than a minute to record and they lipsync and you’re good to go.  Unlike YouTube, Dubsmash doesn’t lash you out for copyright.  It just lets you pick your song  or anything and lets you act.  I love listening to music and I’ve always love lip-syncing to songs in my car, in the shower, just looking myself in the mirror just being silly haha. Dubsmash is another hobby of mine, just like listening to music, writing, reading books, watching tv, working out, etc.

I do think that this generation is kind of losing its touch when it comes to socializing with people. We could be sitting across from each other having a conversation though our phones without making eye contact or without a full blown face to face dialogues. At the end of the day, it depends you. You choose the people to hangout with and how you are with your phone around them. Is is necessary to have a conversation with friend and you’re always on the phone when you’re with them? Always taking selfies around them. At the end of the day, it depends on how people use their phones and know when to use them. It depends on the people you’re choosing to be around with. Some people do not want to have  their phones around their peers and they would turn off the phone and hang out. Some people  do both. It depends.

I grew up in a generation (late 80s) where I never had cell phones, we had Nintendo and outside was our freedom. A generation were we had mostly sitcoms and cartoon series on tv, we had no reality shows. We had internet, but it was for checking emails and chatting with people online. We had no social media, no Youtube.  Back when cordless phones were popular. We had our own  walkman, listened our tapes and using the FF and RW button.   We had a strong social interacting with our peers around us.  We came from a generation were VCR existed and we had to set a timer to record shows.  I remember when pagers used to be out and now everybody is on their iPhones, ordering movies from apple tv, downloading songs off the internet, movies too. Ordering clothes, books, food, etc. from the Internet.

I believe that this generation is missing out the social aspect of going places to meet people, picking up the phone to call people instead of texting, going for a walk.  Cellphones are causing a lot accidents on the road, people lost lives due to texting and driving. It’s crazy right? Who would have thought that by 2015  there’s a law on texting and driving? Back then it was drinking, speeding, smoking and driving.   People recording themselves as they’re driving and uploading it on youtube. Paying attention to the road, being stuck in traffic are making people bored and frustrated. People are becoming more restless and always trying to find something to do. Text, music, talking on the phone while they drive.

People in my neighbourhood are staying in more than back then when I was growing up, we had everybody outside doing their own thing. I am saying all of these stuff because there is more to just labelling someone who post selfies or many dubsmash  videos on their social media accounts.   Taking a lot of selfies and dubsmash do not make people become narcissistic. You would have to look at the person’s lifestyle, the person’s attitude  and behaviour, and so much more.

I think it depends on the person and how they use their phones and what they’re dong with their lives as well.  I wouldn’t be too quick to assume that for someone who posts a lot of selfies and dubsmash are suddenly being labeled.

I love taking pics of myself.. but am I narcissistic? Am I obsessed? Not necessarily. I enjoy using my phone. I enjoy being around with people. I’m taking care of myself. I’m aware of my surroundings.   I think Dubsmash is a great way for people like myself to get things off their mind and just enjoy life a bit. I think selfies are great.    As long as you are doing other things in life that is keeping you busy off the phone and you’re using your phone because you need a break and want to have fun with it.

What about you? Why do you take selfies? For those who like the app, Dubsmash, why do you like to use Dubsmash?


Letting Go

I stumbled through these three images. I never really understood these quotes about #love back then, but now I do.

I believe that #SELFLOVE has made my life easier. It’s an incredible reminder for me to have.  Letting go is powerful and it is not selfish. We need to embrace ‘letting go’. Letting go is not onlysetting yourself free, but it means that you’re respecting the person’s truths and you’re allowing the person to find their happiness and their decisons. Yes, the situation may be messed up. I would rather have someone tell me that they don’t love me rather to be lead on simply because they don’t have the guts to say, no.

Continue to *thank* those who were able to tell the truth no matter what. That is a courage as well, it’s better than lying. Bitterness won’t get you anywhere at your end. Yes, so much time, effort and energy was put in it; but it was what it was .. your experiences became the footprints in the sand and it disappeared; all that is left a memory. How you define that memory is your business and the feelings you had were valid. There are more rooms for new love.

Stop having high expectations. Stop allowing ourselves to get hurt badly b/c we fail to admit though denial that there was a flaw, we hang on to something that wasn’t meant to be. Stopping these things does not mean your life ends; it is another new chapter in your life. Offering many more new possibilities.

Expect the unexpected. Fall in love with someone who you deserve. ❤ – Z

Beachbody Products will make you sweat more and lose weight faster than the gym

People should understand that going to the gym is good but you’ll have to “KNOW” what to do when you get there. You’ll have to know the equipments and use them properly. For a newcomer, you’ll be overwhelmed.  You’ll be paying $100 – $200 and plus for trainers that will only try and help you lose the weight you want to lose. When you go to the gym, you’ll be distracted, you’ll get overwhelmed because the only thing you’d know is to join gym classes with a lot of people. You’ll get overwhelmed lifting weight and trying to do everything you can but you can’t because it’s expensive to get a trainer. Even if you do get a trainer, you’d probably won’t get the results you expect to get. The more time you want with your trainer the more money you will be spending toward him or her.  However, with Beachbody, you can put in that DVD every day,  have your own trainer telling you what to do on the TV screen. It’s easier, it’s faster and you can press that play button anytime. You’ll even sweat more than ever.   People ask me what I do with my fitness, I use Beachbody and I drink Shakeology.

Beachbody products are workout dvds that will help you lose weight quicker and it’s a lot cheaper than the gym because you’ll be working out at your home following the workout schedule, nutrition guide and a Shakeology package.   I don’t know what the fear is with making a decision to order a beachbody package because all you’re doing is making a change in your life. Making a difference to yourself and the peers around you.

If you are struggling or wondering where to start losing weight, Beachbody is the place you should start going. Workout dvds includes P90X3,  Insanity, 21 Day Fix, PiYo, T25 and many more.  People are so caught up on what Shakeology?? And what does it do to you while you’re working out. Stop trying to find excuses NOT to use Beachbody or NOT to use Shakelogy because you don’t know unless you try it.

Check out the videos about Shakeology: Protein Superfood Shake.

If you want to get started, contact me at to get you started. With me, you’ll get to choose your beachbody dvd packages and will be put in a challenge group on facebook where many members encouraging you to accomplish your goals.  I’ll be your coach to get you motivated.

Check out my coach website: 

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